Few things are more challenging for a child than having their parents divorce. While most children learn to deal with the new situation, it can be a tough few months or even years while they work towards that.
One thing that parents can do to help them adjust is to be consistent. It can help rebuild the stability that the divorce will have reduced. Here are a few areas where consistency could help:
Consistency around rules and discipline
It’s not always necessary for both parents to apply the same rules as each other but it can help the child to know where they stand. It can also reduce the chance they try to play one parent off against the other.
If your child knows that curfew time is 9 pm on schooldays, whichever house they are at, they can more easily make plans. If they know that getting home later than that will lead to their phone being taken they are less likely to do it. Consistency gives children clear boundaries to abide by and clear consequences if they do not.
Consistency around how you share parenting time
How much your child moves between houses will depend on the parenting agreement you make. They might even spend all their nights in the same house, just heading out during the daytime with a non-custodial parent.
If they divide their time between two households, consistency in which days of the week they move and the timing of it can make it easier to remember everything they need to take. It also makes it easier for them to plan things with friends and join in activities at local clubs. For example, a local sports team may want to know they are available every Saturday.
Getting help to consider these things when creating your parenting agreement can help you make decisions that ease your child’s transition into this new stage of their life.