New Jersey parents who find themselves in a struggling marriage might question whether they should remain together or end the relationship and seek a divorce. While this is always a difficult question, it can become even more complex when there are children involved.
Saving the marriage
There are arguments for parents staying together even after they no longer love their partner. This means that parents may sacrifice their needs for their children’s needs. Some studies have shown that children experience emotional devastation when their parents seek a dissolution of marriage. However, staying together for the kids is only a good option if parents can work together to successfully co-parent their children without constant fights and anger.
Staying together also depends on several other factors. These include:
• Both spouses being willing to repair their bond and revive their marriage
• Seeking outside counseling in the relationship
• Ensuring that there is no abuse or neglect of the children
• Working together to co-parent their children healthily
The argument for divorce
Other experts argue that parents should never remain together for the sake of their children, particularly if they struggle to even be civil to each other. Remaining together can have long-lasting negative consequences for children who are raised in an environment where parents are constantly arguing and where everyone consistently experiences pain and frustration. Parents in those situations might be so focused on their own problems that they even neglect their children, physically, emotionally or both. Children who grow up in that type of environment might also repeat that behavior when they become parents.
If parents do decide to seek a divorce, they will need to negotiate the details of their divorce decree, custody agreement and parenting plan. They might choose to consult family law attorneys to help them through the stages of the divorce process.